Ramblings: 8/4/2018

Today, my mom and I went to a shop. I sent her ahead so that I could park my scooter. After our purchase, we come out of the shop to see a car parked behind our scooter. 😐 

We tried at first to pull the scooter through the space that was available behind it. But, it was a failure. Though I love racing the bike around, I am at a loss while trying to maneuver a stationary scooter. I just lack the upper body strength for it.

So I pulled the scooter ahead and we decided to wait for sometime. And as usual my mom got upset with the waiting and she said let’s try again. After my multiple, “No, mummy it won’t work”, I got the scooter up from the side stand and my mom helped in maneuvering it from behind.

This place where we struggled with our scooter always, I mean day or night always, has some local Goans around. None of them lifted a finger. 

To my surprise, a tourist who was sitting on a chair at a coffee place, suddenly appeared next to my mom and started helping us. He helped by lifting the scooter slightly and with the maneuvering.

A tourist!

Yeah, I’m sure our Goan fellows must have been sniggering thinking things like, why ride a scooter if you can’t handle it. I don’t care. I’m concerned about the fact that an outsider, a tourist who is supposed to be lying around chilling during his holiday came to help, while the “Goenkars” were lounging on their plastic chairs.

Btw, the tourist had an amazing mandala tattoo on his hand. I’m sure getting one one day! Just because it really does look good. 


Ramblings: (23/03/2018)

I sometimes have these moods; that cast a heavy, dark blanket all over me, which makes me numb to the outside world. I still don’t really understand it, what triggers it, what could help it, or should I say get rid of it. 

When this mood comes over me, I can’t think, I can’t listen, and basically am screaming inside my head the whole time. The worst thing is when a friend asks me what happened and I can’t jokingly say, “mood swings”, because in this mood even trying to smile takes effort.

I usually brave it out, by continuing with my daily work routine and wait for it to lift off on its own. Sometimes a friend or relative helps lift it off which adds a little more happiness.

Ramblings: (17/03/2018)

When your trials are met with complains and comments almost arguing with the need for your tries.

What do I do?

I get tempted to stop. Stop trying again. 

But then I realise if I do stop, it will be me who will be at the losing end. I will be the one who will lose trust in my own efforts. That’s exactly the mentality I can’t afford to have; because trying new things is what makes me me. Getting better at something I am interested in, is just a part and parcel of learning new things. Be it languages, cooking, baking, hair styles, art or craft. No one should be able to stop me.

Next time someone complains about something you tried, keep a straight face, smile and joke about your failures along with them. But, go home, learn from your mistakes and try again! 😊

Good night peeps 😴

Ramblings: 08/03/2018

Today, I started my day with a cold, the continuous-sneezing-blowing-into-a-tissue kind; and spent more time holding my head in pain, than actually doing any productive work at office.

The worst part is that most of my sneezes tend to be internal. So, I hold my nose expecting a huge sneeze and receive in return a numbing pain, causing my eyes to brim with tears.

According to a website:

Internal Sneeze: Nothing actually comes out but only an odd “ump” noise. It’s surprising that the person’s eardrums don’t explode.

I am surprised my eardrums do not explode too. 😀

How would you handle sneezing continuously in a cafeteria during lunch? When standing and leaving is not an option? and obviously going hungry is not an option too.

My usual go-to move is to look away/down and sneeze away, usually crumbling into a mess. 😀

Ramblings: (15/02/2018)

This post goes to those people in my life who are always around; engraved into my daily activities, so much so, that their sudden absence, even for a day (even for an hour) wrecks all my schedules and leaves a small little hole in my imperfect little life.

All I can say is Thank You! 😘 for being there always and I hate you (a teeny bit) for your sudden absences. 😂😅

Ramblings: (05/02/2018)

Are you satisfied with your life?

If given a choice to leave this world behind without any regrets, would you take it?

My friends and I had this discussion today after lunch, and one of them outright said that she had no qualms with welcoming death anytime. Though her reasons were not something that needs to be publicised, her requirements were clear. A happy, painless death. I think I am missing an adjective there. But those were her requirements.

As for me, nope. I am not ready for death. I want a happy death and I hope I get to see a natural one. I have many things to do in this world, many more places to visit. Though I go into those dark moods where I would gladly welcome death, I don’t think we fully understand the depth of being dead. It’s like full stop. Full stop to me, my name, my identity. 

Nope, I need to discover more about me myself first. I need an answer to the puzzle that is me before anyone else solves it. I need to see Venice, Amsterdam, the Northen Lights! ❤ Come on, I need to find that one guy who will show me that love is an actual thing and not a fairytale.

You think I don’t settle with what I have? No, I don’t and I won’t. I want more. I didn’t spend years (25 to be precise) climbing mountains to just say I’m done, that I’m satisfied.

And I don’t think my friend is too. 😜

Ramblings: 21/01/2018

I was going to write this post describing how I felt about loving and growing old with a person for a major part of your life, and then suddenly the person just dying. There’s no other way to say it. Your one person who was your everything is dead. I can’t imagine the pain people feel. I personally cannot bear when a close relation passes. But, this would be your person! My question was going to be – Why go through all that? Why have your own person ? When we know people are fragile.

But, then I realized the countless people who would shout out the many pros of the years having a person to love, share moments, grow together, raise kids.

Life is truly funny. It gives and takes.

Year 2017

It’s a little late for this post but the usual holiday laziness kept me busy and made me postpone writing this post. 😁

This post is going to be the countdown of my most favorite memories of 2017. I may be the only person who would read it countless times in the years to come, but the smile on my future self is worth the long post.  😊


The year started with the usual new year (2017) midnight mass with my family. Then back in Goa, the ever awaited event at office – Pulse started and it was amazing. The fact that I was off a full-fledged project was a big bonus for me.
Organizing the quiz event and the Kala Chasma/Zingat dance need a big mention! @Thwe, we kinda rocked it 😁😜
Yeah, I also managed to keep my kala chasma (sunglasses) on even for the Zingat song, which made friends who noticed laugh at the idiot that I am! 😁


That’s Twinie and me with the medal(s) we won during the Sports day – the one day I deem myself sporty enough to stand around in the sun the whole day getting tanned. 😜

I got my hair highlighted with purple color the second time (which was hardly visible on my dark curls). This time, Thwe gave me company and got the ends of her tresses colored red. Though I was kinda unsatisfied with the end product, during the next few months the fading color perfectly complimented my previously highlighted hair.

This is the month I got to work on something that actually had me interested in coding, before getting myself stuck in something I truly came to hate.


My favorite month right after none. ❤

Owing to the fact that I would be completing my quarter life that month, I decided to fulfill some of my wishes.

So, on the 15th I had a tattoo imprinted on my hand (didn’t want to disturb the tattoo artist on 14th 😉 ) and got my ears pierced on the 19th.

I had my cousin – Joli accompany me for the tattoo and a friend – Pinky for the ear piercing (was a tad tipsy that day). I kinda freaked out when a baby started crying at the top of her lungs when her ears were pierced and I ended up pulling the hands of the guy piercing my ears, until Pinky gave me a slight warning. 😂

IMG-20170219-WA0024On the 20th (yes, the day after I got my ears pierced) was my friends – Aksh’s engagement in Karwar. All dressed up we – Thwe, Twinie, Ruddh and I travelled the 3 hours to the occasion.

Then came the 21st !! My birthday !! As the years go by, my excitement for this particular day decreases more. Like mehh cake, mehhh blow candles, But on one side it hurt (a liiiiitle) to have not cut a single cake – definitely a first. But mehhh life goes on. 😈

The festivities continued with Pinky’s birthday which we celebrated at a nearby restaurant – Ben & Sands and then a visit to the beach the same night.

We helped in organizing the Cyber Champs event (the photo with the group all in black).
I painted a abstract painting for my cousin. Just got the feeling to paint something and that’s exactly what I did! My first solo canvas painting :D.


This month was Bhi’s birthday.

My godchild is born ! She was born on the 8th of March, so currently she is 10 months young, waddling along holding her dad’s hand, pointing at everything and trying out her vocal chords. I am not going to be adding any photos of her here any time coz you know they say bhuri nazar and all, and I really don’t want to risk it!


April brought along many celebrations.

We started the month with Aksh’s Bach. The Pune girls came for the celebration, which made it perfect from the beginning. We had lunch, massage session, paintball, ross omelet stop and then finally the dinner. To say we had fun would be a really bad understatement. 😂

The next day, I got to spend the day with Niee and Shub who were supposed to leave that evening. Shub went with her college friends. Niee got her second tattoo and then we went to try out the famous Jess’s Fish Thali (famous in our friend circle at least).

Then on the 21st was Nesh’s wedding !!! Didn’t get involved much in his wedding keeping in mind that he’s a good friend. Come to think of it – guess there’s a very fine line between being friends as colleagues and being friends.


Genius’s birthday!

Aksh’s wedding and reception ! 14th and 20th were respectively the two occasions and we enjoyed a lot!

Pearl’s baptism: it was my Godchilds baptism on the 21st. The day I became officially a Godparent. 😁 Yeah, every time I held her she screamed her lungs out, but who knows she may like me later? :S


Hmm… June, June, June, don’t remember anything important during this month.

Thwe’s nephews birthday, where we hogged and played games. 😀

I guess we started our swimming lessons this month. We being – Bhi and I. We “learned” to freestyle, and that’s it. Apparently we didn’t have the strength to even try out the other strokes, like the butterfly stroke which made us look more like frogs. 😀

I went to visit mom, dad this month. Had the most calm, worry-free weekend.


Aksh’s birthday

Preparation for mom dad’s arrival: mummy daddy were arriving on the 1st of August, which meant I had to make the house spic and span before that. Which meant double checking for dust bunnies, sweeping and mopping every corner of the house. Amazing workout!


mom dad are here ! Mummy, Daddy and my brother reached as expected on the 1st and as I had planned I spent almost the whole month working from home. Like some researchers say – 21 days are more than enough to get used to anything. Getting used to being around family is something that takes less than 21 days. Especially missed were my brother’s snide remarks on everything. When they left it just made me feel out of place here.


Yeah, I spent most of September moping around, missing my family. Wish there was a better way to be with family without any restrictions like would I get a job, would it give good pay, etc. Being away from family for a long time, makes you kind of realize what you are missing.

At the end of the month – had to travel to visit mom dad for some official work and the weekend was free of the usual debates, which made it even more better.


Start of diet. I made a vow when I was with mummy that I would start a diet once I was back in Goa, and that’s exactly what I did. Dal Chapatti, Steamed veggies and fish, lots of water and fruits, and porridge!!! Included was a minimum of 30mins on the treadmill.

Planning for spinsters party. Yeah we planned for Pinky’s spinsters party.

Yada. Yada. Yada.


Continued diet.

Pune !!! After years of postponing this trip, I actually went ahead with it this time! And excluding the few necessary issues, we had the best time ! Bestest best time !! Hard Rock Cafe !! ❤ Thwe, if you are still reading: whenever however we should go again !!!! 😁😍

Thwe’s birthday!

Prep for sangeet, which included practising our dance 😂 staying awake for hours late at night! That too on workdays, ending up in me roaming around like a zombie at office.


Genius and Pinky’s sangeet and wedding!!

This month was made up of dressing up and going for so many weddings !!! 7 weddings is an all time record for me.

Work was bad but managed it though.

Jazz’s last day 😦

Then at last peace, when I left Goa on the 19th to celebrate the holiday season with Mummy Daddy.

Christmas and New Year was as usual the same with family. Happy and comforting. 😊 just being around family is more than enough during these occasions.

THE END – Year 2018 *-)

I thought of adding a lot of photos and adding some color to this but that’s lots of photos to upload and insert so, this is the best I can do.

Ramblings: 19/12/2017

One of my worst experiences, being a complete introvert, is when I’m not in any mood to interact but I’m stuck in a public place. I either get rude or completely ignore people which would qualify as being one and the same ?

Like 4 o’clock in the morning at the airport. Nope I’m not talking, not even gesturing. 

It’s especially bad when a person sits next to or opposite you and desperately tries to gain your eye contact and you try your best not to. Which ends up making me look all kinds of crazy. Staring at the floor, at the pizza, at the coffee, anywhere but the person.

Yeah, I tend to be anti-social at times but it’s 4 in the morning !

Ramblings: 08/12/2017

You know how sometimes you get the feeling like it wouldn’t make a difference if you did a certain thing? but you go ahead, and it actually doesn’t make any difference?
Like yesterday I was invited for a get-together by my aunt but she didn’t seem to care when I said that I might not be able to make it. Feeling guilty later, I rush to their place to be there for the get-together, after work. But, she didn’t really seem to care that I came.
First of all, why invite someone you don’t want to meet? The person would have taken the trouble to come all the way only to be met by a cold shoulder. (Please don’t imagine a cold shoulder top) 😀
Secondly, If this ever happens to you. Don’t. Give. A. Damn. You did what you felt is right. You know what’s going on in your life. What others have against you is their business not yours. At the end of the day, you will have to justify your actions to your conscience. You matter more than anyone else. However close you are to them.
Yeah, maybe after some days (or weeks/years), you should call them up or meet them and talk about the issue. 😀 😉