Last Sunday, I got a new badge. I’m now officially the Godmother of a cute, little, grinning baby girl. The one I lovingly call Pearl. ❤
She’s the pearl of all our eyes. 😍
As Sunday was a big day for all of us, we had a session with our Parish priest the previous day. He explained to us the what’s and why’s of the sacrament. Then he gave us a talk on how it is now our responsibility. Normally we just think-‘They are the parents, let them worry about the kid’. But, the father then turned to me and said, ‘As the godmother it your duty to correct her parents if you feel they are guiding her the wrong way. Your duty to correct her if she goes on any wrong path.’
Okay, what I expected when the parents told me that they would name me as the godmother was, maybe be there for the kid. I have no model exactly on what a good godmother should be. Haven’t met mine for decades.
I only hope I do right by my Godchild. 😊
So, I started reading a book. A book that I randomly chose; like one minute I am blankly checking out tops on an online shopping site and ting! I want to read this book; so I check out some of its reviews, and my interest peaks.
I expect the usual drama, the usual oh-so-pretty, oh-so-talented and oh-so-attractive female protagonist and her usual rugged, handsome, charming male lover.
I don’t realise when I got lost in its world. In the faerie realm, I must add the adjective – beautiful faerie realm. Not usually being a person who loves fantasy, I like to focus on reality and would gladly skip the parts that the author has taken pains to describe in detail – a magical something.
Not this book.
I got totally lost in its world. Totally captured by its beauty, the ensuing drama between the characters. Captured just like a book is supposed to capture a reader.
The times that I have to take a break from reading gives me the Avatar kind of feel. My real world feels fake, and the world conjured in my mind by the author seems to be the real one. Full of magic and love. Beautiful colors and dark corridors.
I still have yet to complete it and find out who wins.😈
Psst… The book’s name is A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas.
Yes, apparently a YA book.
Those mornings when I wake up and a random song starts playing my mind, and it manages to be the only song I hum all day long; only song I listen to all day. Those are my best days. You can say or do anything to me. I will reply or ignore you while humming my song. 😉
Today I woke up with “Baby, you’re all that I want, when you’re lying here in my arms. Can’t find it hard to believe we are in heaven!”. Yeah, yeah I messed up the lyrics. I do that, put in my own words, not caring if they make sense or not. 😁😅
I’ll be singing on the stairs up, the stairs down, while having lunch, while coding, basically everytime, anywhere. 😁
So, today is dedicated to Bryan Adams – Heaven and the Cascada cover.
Thursday, 13th April 2017
It’s the Holy Week and as usual on it’s Wednesday, my cousin/aunt and I hurry for confession. A ritual(?) that we follow in which we tell our sins to a priest who in turn forgives us. Almost like wiping the slate clean (at least the part that we had the guts to confess). That’s what I like to think happens – the partially clean slate.
The bigger question – what is a sin?
My description of sin would be – Anything that hurts someone mentally or physically. It includes all the “bad” feelings like jealousy and anger. I usually use the 10 Commandments as a template when I explain to friends who ask what a sin would incorporate.
I guess I should maybe add myself to the list of people I hurt because of the whole “Your body is a temple of God” line in the bible. Some might find drinking (alcohol) a sin, some might find getting tattooed a sin. But in my eyes, it’s not a sin. Abusing alcohol to such a rate that you increase the possibility of killing yourself, is a whole different story. My friend lightly argued one fine day that I had sinned when I tattooed my hand. That tattoos and piercings are sins. But, I had an argument ready, my own parents had pierced my ears when I was just a baby. So, if I was already a sinner, maybe I can continue being one.
Who is to be blamed for that particular sin?
Mummy/Daddy or me?
Event in office.
A lady from the HR tells me to help with a counter, I say, “Okay”.
She tells me to help with the coupon counter too, “Okay”
She later tells me to help in distribution of sweets, “Okay”
A colleague at the same time says, “Please help with photographs”. As usual I say “Okay”.
An onlooking acquaintance remarks, “Carol, Learn to say NO!”.
Gonna be three years now, guess I haven’t learned my lesson yet.
That moment when you want to just pull someone’s hair screaming
“stop being so smug! stop acting like you know me! you only know me coz I made the mistake of trusting you! stop acting friendly with all the beautiful thoughts in your presumptuous mind”
but all you actually do is look away and concentrate on something else.
Why waste energy on someone who clearly doesn’t care.
Sometimes the people you trust hurt you the most. Those that you expect will always be there are the first ones to betray and run away.
I know I promised happy posts but, life is not all happy. 🙂
“I am driving back home via a dark road. There’s an old lady standing ahead at the side of the road. She’s dusting all cars that pass with some sort of ash or maybe sand. I don’t want that on my car. So, I stop next to her and say, Don’t do that! Don’t throw that on my car!
Looking at her face, I can make out she’s angry. Very angry. I decide to ignore her anger and continue driving to my home, which is just around the corner.
I look through the rear view mirror and I see the old lady still glaring at me. I get scared now, and somehow manage to mix up my gears. And the car splutters to a stop. I look back and see her start running toward the car, and the way she does that seems to be with her both arms and legs. I start fiddling with my gears, trying to put it in first gear. I get the car started and move ahead fast, with the lady still following. I turn the corner and head towards my home. I park the car, look behind and notice in relief that the lady isn’t anywhere in sight.
I enter my home, say hi to mom, and lie down on the sofa. That was a heck of a day!
Ting-Tong goes the bell!
I hear mom go to the door to open it and talking sweetly to someone. The next moment she comes into the hall. She says, Carol see who’s come. This lady was asking for you. You know her?
In shock I get up to see the old lady standing behind mom. The minute I see her, she gives me a wicked smile and then vanishes into thin air!”
That’s the moment I wake up from my sleep with a start, sweating and shivering badly. The more I think about it, the more worse the nightmare gets. Like instead of running behind my car, the old lady jumps on my car in one long jump, then jumps ahead of my car and then vanishes. Like she knows exactly what I would be scared of.
I look at the time. 11:30pm. Whole night to go and I caught an early show of my scariest nightmare. Tsk-Tsk.
Waking up in the morning (or rather getting shocked into reality by the irritating alarm), just counting the hours till I can sleep again. It’s like I am hoping that the hours and the day’s activities just completely get skipped or fast forward till I can go back to sleep.
I know, I know, I sound like the laziest person around. Yeah, I am. It’s so easy to just forget everything while sleeping. Forget confrontations, problems, bank work 😣. Why go through all that when I can just be lying on my bed, dreaming up a nice life for me.
Dreams are necessary too, right?
I recieved a complaint from a friend that I rarely post anything but sad posts. So, from today onward I will try to post happy thoughts and hopefully spread happy vibes. 😀
So, happy thoughts, happy thoughts, happy thoughts….
Had a nice time (ahem happy time) talking to the friend about tattoo ideas. And being
a person who makes instant decisions, she promptly fell in love with one particular design and decided to have it tattooed as soon as possible. That sort of instant decision making is something I want to strive for! I had decided the design I wanted tattooed on my hand a year back. As the months went by, I changed the location of the to-be-tattoo design from my left hand wrist -> my right hand thumb-> right hand forearm -> right hand inner elbow -> left hand inner elbow.
I went to the tattoo parlor along with a cousin, the design saved in my cell and the location decided – left hand inner elbow, coz apparently, the left hand blood vessels are connected directly to the heart, so has a higher significance and blah, blah, blah. I told the tattoo artist what and where I wanted the tattoo. The guy basically said No to my idea. As I wanted the word to be tattooed facing me, Come On! I want to read it! What in hell would be the reason to get tattooed if others can read it and I’m stuck staring at the upside down version of it?
We then showed him images online, which had the same tattoo but at the wrist. so, after all the changes in location, I got the tattoo done on the same location I had decided a year back! 😀 Fun to be ME! 😀
My tattoo pic:
Yes, that’s my hand, my left wrist to be precise.
Why the ‘Believe’ you would ask?
Well, I have many things I need to believe in. Firstly, Believe in myself. Believe in tomorrow. Believe in many more things.
Have a great Friday. 🙂
This is a fairly unnecessary topic, but I felt I should just comment on it a bit. You know the first time you meet a person, a stranger who you have no idea likes or dislikes what you have to offer. But, the first smile shared between two individuals brings to peace all the internal turmoil. Everything will be just fine.
A smile is the beginning and continuation of the most beautiful things. It could be friendships, love, or just a passing smile from a stranger which could brighten your day a little more.
A smile signifies that a friend isn’t angry anymore. That mom and dad are happy to see you bumbling around the house. While a sibling is discussing a mutual interest. A smile could trigger so many feelings inside.
Just a beautiful smile. 🙂
Keep smiling always!